Enneagram at Work
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Enneagram at Work
55. Three Things a Chris Stapleton Concert Taught Me About Using the Enneagram
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What does Chris Stapleton switching out his guitar for every song have to do with applying your Enneagram type in real life?
Or how does his 8 person band affect how you think about the Enneagram in general, even if you haven't yet figured out your type?
Or what does the fact that my boyfriend and I cried and smiled during the course of this concert have to do with living a full life?
Listen in to this week's episode to hear how to apply Chris Stapleton's concert strategy to your own Enneagram journey.
And as a bonus, you'll also hear 3 visibility takeaways that you can use for inspiration as you market and promote yourself and offers.
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Looking to learn more about yourself and how to find the best visibility strategies for you? My new self study program, EnneaBrand may be just want you are looking for :) Check it out and enroll at https://www.enneagrammba.com/enneabrand.
Welcome to the Enneagram MBA Podcast, a show for aspiring and growing entrepreneurs and unfulfilled employees who know they are capable of playing bigger. If you are wanting to identify your gifts, find your purpose, do work that matters, and create a ripple effect that goes beyond yourself, you're in the right place. Each week you'll get resources, strategies, and support to help you get to know yourself, to get to know and understand others, like your future clients, and help you get known so that you can reach more people with your gifts and purpose. So grab your notebook or open up your notes app, and I will see you in class. I recently got to go down to the Chris Stableton concert down at Kruger Field in Lexington, Kentucky. It was the first concert that had been held at that football stadium. Um, and it was sold out. It was packed, it was a gorgeous day. It was one of my most fun concert experiences. Cheryl Crow opened up. Um, well, somebody local opened up, but um funny story was that we actually ended up having to go back to our parked car three times because we walked up there originally and then we didn't know that you couldn't bring in purses into the stadium. I even have like a tiny one, but I guess it was still too big. So we had to walk back to find the scooter and then ride the scooter like I don't know, the mile and a half plus back to the car. So I put the purse in the car, and then um we got back up to the stadium, rode the scooter back up, and then I forgot the tickets in the car that were in my purse. Um it was not so funny at the time. So we had to make the trip back to walk and find a scooter and then go back to the car on the scooter and then ride back. We finally made it. So we missed the opening act and then we missed um most of Cheryl Crow. We caught a few songs at the end. She's amazing, she's 60 years old. Oh my gosh, this woman can still sing, she looks fabulous. Um, and she it was she just had such great energy, took me back to my to my middle school and high school days. Um, so that was fun. And then Willie Nelson did an entire set. Um we he this man is 88 years old, and we thought he for sure would just, you know, play a few songs and then Chris would come on. But he did a whole set, very impressive. Um, and then Chris did end up, did end up obviously coming on, but we had great seats um thanks to my boyfriend who had been watching these these tickets. It was a week before that we got the ticket. So last minute from a woman on Craigslist who this concert had been rescheduled twice because of COVID. Um, and so it just didn't work for for her to come up from where she lived in Nashville. Unfortunately, it was such a good show. So I hate that she missed out on it, but grateful we got to use the tickets. So we were there, it was amazing. Um, like I said, the weather was phenomenal, super sunny, warm, but a breeze. And then when the night, when the sun um went down, it was still warm enough that it wasn't freezing. It was just it was just so fun. Such a great concert. It was good to be around people. And then Chris Stapleton, I mean, this man is amazing. This man blows my mind how smart he is when it comes to all the songs that he has written. He will have these little phrases, these pieces of a song that just say so much in just a few words. And you're like, oh my gosh, that just tells a whole story. How do you do that? So the fact that he has written songs for I think I think he has over 170 songs that he has written. Of course, my boyfriend and I went into like research mode after this concert. His wife is incredibly talented. So I'm going on and on, I'm nerding out about this concert, but he is amazing, which if you are a fan, you already know this. Um, the concert was incredible. And as I was watching it though, because of the nerd that I am, and I know you know when you get into the Enneagram, when you get into personal development work, like you can just really nerd out and always be thinking about that kind of stuff, regardless of where you're at. So that's what happened to me during this concert. I started thinking about Enneagram examples and Enneagram analogies. And so I thought I'll share three of those that came up as reminders for our own personal development journey. Um, these are reminders for myself as well. And so I'll just I'll share them with you in case they're helpful for you too. So I have three Enneagram-related ones, and then I actually have three bonus ones that have to do with visibility. So we'll stick in some specific personal branding, visibility, marketing um strategy in here too, or some things to think about your strategy. So the first takeaway was that the thing that we noticed um several songs in, my boyfriend had pointed out that he had used a different guitar for every song. And I don't know that he ended up using the same guitar twice. He probably did. We we didn't pay attention that closely as the songs got went on, but he was at least five or six songs in, and we had been keeping track of his guitars, which they were all beautiful, but he had a different guitar for almost every song. And I thought that was such a great analogy for really two things. One, how intentional he was, so he wasn't just using the same guitar for every song, which I'm sure that it would have sounded amazing. Like he's he's amazing, he could have made it work, I'm sure. But that that kind of reminded me of how when it and it doesn't just have to do with the Enneagram, it's just being a human being. We have created habits, and those habits lead to triggers and reactions or stories. We've created these stories, the way that we process information, create these patterns, habits, reactions. And we can we've used those and we're not going to demonize them. They're not the enemy within. It's really, you know, a child, our inner child within that growing up figured out how to get our needs met, figured out how to get what we want, how to feel safe. And so we kept doing that over and over. And those different patterns developed into what our personality is now. And the Enneagram can shine light on where those core coping strategies and core defense mechanisms are, depending on what which type you most resonate with. And none of that is bad. There's no pattern, there's no strategy, there's no mechanism that is bad. It has served a purpose. The problem happens when we use the same strategy for everything, when we use the same defense mechanism over and over and over without thinking. It's on autopilot a lot. And so when you can shine light on those spots, as cringy as they are in the beginning, you start to realize, oh my gosh, I don't have to use that all the time. Or oh, it's the first realization is I oh my gosh, I didn't know that I was only using this one strategy or two or three, maybe. And so you can start to get more intentional then with what strategy you use in a different situation. So we can use the hammer, right? To to hit a nail in, very necessary, very helpful, very needed. It would probably be hard to use any other tool. It's just that a lot of times the way that we have developed, we're on autopilot using that hammer for everything. And that's when it doesn't serve us anymore. And so I just thought it was interesting how Chris was so intentional about the tool, in this case, the guitar, that he used based on what song he was he was going into. And so that I think is the goal for understanding one of the goals for understanding our personality is for it to serve us, to serve others, to be helpful, not hindering or hurt us. And so the more aware we can be of what situation we're going into, what song we're going into in this case, in Chris's case, the more intentional we can be about what tool or guitar we're bringing into that song to for it to be the best that it can be. Um, it won't happen all the time, right? But the more intentionality you can bring to it, the more helpfulness it can be for, the more helpful it can be for you. The other thing that made me think of the Enneagram that Chris did was that he was the lead singer, but he had seven other people in his band. And that is kind of like our Enneagram type in that there is one lead singer. There is one type that's going to be running the show, but that doesn't mean that that is the only type that you will see come through in your life. You will absolutely see other tendencies, qualities from the other types, stress qualities and growth qualities, and just general qualities, behaviors from the other type. I think sometimes people get confused about what their dominant type is because they think it has to be 100% that type, 100% all the of the time. And that's not true. It's you're going to, there's going to be things about that dominant type that don't resonate, that you don't do. Um, there's going to be times when you don't use it. You use something else. You got your backup singer, you got your piano man, the the um the other guitar player. I'm I'm very musically illiterate. So these are not the official names I know of the people in his band, but the I think you get the point here is that you you're going to see a flavor of all nine types show up in your life in some way at some times. It's just there's going to be one that's really out front running the show, kind of dictating who comes in when. Um, and the more, again, intentionality you bring to that, the more that your band is going to be in harmony and sounding good or you know, being helpful to you. Um, it's just that who needs to be where, when do they need to come in? What type do you need in what situation? You know, is it your wing? Is it your you're going into your arrow? Is it just, hey, I just need to harness some, some, some peacemaker energy for this situation, or I need to harness some some logic, some my my data, not drama, my type five energy, whatever it might be for you. Um, but bringing those people in with intention. And then the third thing that made me think of the Enneagram is that, and just for this is more kind of personal development, personal growth awareness here is that uh I'm actually playing around with this idea. I don't know what I'm gonna do it with it. Um, and maybe this is all that it is, but something around in the defense of bad days. And I don't know if it's gonna be a training or maybe, yeah, maybe it is just this mention right here. Because there's so much pressure to always have a good day, to have positive vibes, to be happy, to everything works out for a reason. And I have talked about this in different episodes and in different ways, and guests have mentioned it too. It's just, I think we are as a as a collective kind of waking up to we don't always have to be positive. It doesn't always have to be good. Um, and then getting more comfortable with sitting with our own hard emotions and those of others. So some of us need to practice more than others, me being in the that camp could continue to practice. Um, but what made me think of that is that, you know, he played, he had really slow songs, he had really fast songs, he had some super sad songs, and then he had some really fun songs. And the whole concert was incredible because of that variety, right? If he would have only played sad songs, I think maybe the fourth or fifth song in, I still would have been like, man, this man has an amazing voice. But I've been like, gosh, okay, got really sad. Or if all of them had been really fun and kind of, you know, dancing, it wouldn't have brought the same mix of emotion. It was just a really, um, I'm there's a word that I have here, and I'm I'm not, I'm it's not coming. It's not coming, but it was just a really um the whole picture of the concert was was so meaningful. It was fun and it was deep. It was it tugged at your heartstrings and then made you want to, you know, twirl a little bit. So the whole thing, just that mixture of everything really made it beautiful. And that is like life, right? Um, I don't have to tell you this, and I'm not gonna going to say everything happens for a reason. I think we should expect, not wish or you know, expect to the point where we're looking for the bad necessarily, but you know, at some point in the next day, next week, next month, something's not going to go your way. You're going to have a bad day, you're going to have a hard hour. And I think the problem for a lot of people is that we expect, we're expecting everything to go amazing all the time. And I think there's it's, I want, I'm gonna put the intention out there for this to go well, but I know that sometimes things don't go well or don't go the way I want them to. And so knowing how to navigate through that, you know, it's okay to fall apart. Sometimes you need to fall apart. Um, sometimes you don't need to hold it all together, right? It's just the the allowing for things to unfold however they're unfolding and not forcing them to be quote unquote good or quote unquote um positive experiences, um, just allowing them to be what they are, because that mix is what makes your life full. It's what makes your life so meaningful. The hard times, while they may, you know, incredibly be incredibly hard, incredibly suck. Um, maybe it's just, I know, just a little thing, but it can put you in a funk, whatever, whatever that is, whatever that looks like, um, that's what makes the good those good times you're able to appreciate those because you have that contrast, right? So um I I'm not talking about depression. I'm I'm not a medical expert or um have expertise in that field, but uh uh on a certain level, there is that um that expectation though from a lot of people to that make it seem like, gosh, if I'm not in a bad mood, or if I if I am in a bad mood, I'm not in a good mood, something's wrong with me, something's wrong with my life, I'm missing something. We should just expect it to happen. I went into that concert expecting to have a variety of songs, the ebbs and the flows, the slow and the fast, the happy and the the this the tear jerkers, right? And that's what life is. And then when you can not will it, but just expect things eventually to ebb and flow, um, you can kind of be ready, be prepared to navigate around it, allow yourself to feel the feelings, allow yourself to feel the hard, the the madness, the sadness, the worry rather than repress it, knowing this is a part of life, right? So this is something that I'm playing around with, um trying to articulate in a in a in a better way, but there's there's the first version of it. Um, the other three visibility takeaways that I was going to share with you was that he shared a song called What Are You Listening to? It's one of my favorite songs. You might have heard it. Oh my gosh. It's so that's one of those, like, in just a few words, he said so much. And um I love it. I love that song. We listen to it all the time. And he said that when he first released it, it skyrocketed to 47 on the charts and uh kind of laughed about it, right? Because he, I'm sure he was expecting it to go much, much further. Um, and I think that that can happen to all of us. We can expect a post that we share on Instagram to skyrocket an episode that we share, a YouTube video, whatever it is that we're doing. We maybe have an expectation that it's going to skyrocket to to the top of the charts. It's going to get a lot of comments. We've spent so much time. Like he poured his heart and soul into that song. And then for it to, you know, be the highest that it gets to is 47. Gosh, that's kind of disappointing initially. But here he is, still playing it. Um, still, it's very popular now on Spotify. I see the amount of plays that it's gotten. And so that's just sometimes, you know, I think how it goes. He kept at it. He didn't put it away, he didn't burn up the song, he didn't take it down. Um, you know, eventually it got to where it was going. And so we have those things when as a creator, as somebody who puts out content, it may not always do what you want it to do, but that doesn't mean that it was a failure. It won't eventually do what you want it to do. And even if that doesn't, what else would that lead you to? So that was a good reminder. The second visibility takeaway was that um he had um the he was talking about how he had played at bars, the size of the stage. And now he was looking out into the stadium that was sold out. It was a football arena, um floor seats sold out all around him. And then not only that, but he has like 40, 50 plus more shows that he is doing the rest of this year that I would expect to also be selling out. And, you know, I don't I don't know how long that has actually taken him. It's it's not it's definitely not been um automatic. He didn't put out a song or even his first album and then go to selling out football stadiums across Canada and the United States. Um, it has been a process. He just kept at it. He just kept creating, he just kept putting himself out there, material out there, seeing what worked, you know, not letting what didn't stop him from continuing on. And I think that's a really good reminder for myself. And I'm sharing it in case it's for you too, that I don't know that it, I think it just comes down to just not quitting. You know, if you really believe in what you're doing, if you're really um passionate about it, if there's if there is excitement behind it without, regardless of what anybody else thinks, it's eventually going to work out. I don't know when, but it's eventually going to work out. When I first got started in doing my own, whenever I first left my job, I listened to James Wedmore share on a podcast that he would expect it to take about three to four years. So if you could be okay with just getting by for three to four years, eventually it's going to catch up with you. You're going to figure things out, you're going to start getting into the flow. People are going to start noticing, you're going to have the clarity, but it doesn't happen right away. And I was, I was really scared by that. And I was thinking, oh, that's not true. That can't possibly be true. But the more people that I talk to, and then how I see it kind of unfolding for myself, like that timeline is not that crazy. Um, it's not that far off from my own. And so, you know, wherever you are in the in the initial stages of yours, to know that it's probably gonna take longer than you expected. But if you're able just to keep going, it will eventually work out. You're eventually gonna be on your version of the Kroger field, sold-out Kroger field that Chris Stapleton is at. Um, whatever that looks like for you and your personal goals and your personal um experience. And then the last one was that he was he told some stories. And I think Taylor Swift does an amazing job of interacting with her audience from what I have seen on the documentaries that I've watched. I would like to go to one of her concerts in the future. Chris did some of it as well. I think I wanted more actually from him because when he did share a story, the song that he sang next was that much more meaningful. There was actually a song that my boyfriend didn't love, and now I'm forgetting which one it was. Um, but then when he told the story behind um, you know, his father had passed away, he had gone on this trip to Arizona with his wife on the road trip back. He was just kind of reflecting on the meaning of life and the scenery around him, and just kind of, you know, what is the point of all of this? He didn't. Up creating the song Traveler. And um my boyfriend was like, oh my God, I love that song so much more that I know the story behind the song. And you know, how true is that for you and the people that you resonate with and the thing, the companies and the and the products. It's not just the um, it's not just the product, it's not just the message, it's not just the facts, the expertise, it's the stories behind that. I think Brene Brown did an amazing job of that in her HBO Max um docuseries about um, she shared her book, um, The Atlas of the Heart, where she goes through like what is the emotion? What are the emotions? She has definitions of them, but she didn't just stop at that. She had a story for so many of them that made the definition that much more memorable, memorable, more relatable. Um, and that's what Chris did when he was talking about the stories before his songs. Like you remember it more, you feel more connected to it. It means something more when there is a story behind it. So that is something I am personally working on myself. Um, I work with Carol Cox, she has the Speaking Your Brand podcast. And this is one of her pillars of her whole message is to um to step out of the expert trap and to become more of a thought leader. And part of that thought leader is being open and sharing more of your own stories to drive your points home, to relate to your audience, to connect, to make it memorable. And so when he did that, it just made me think, gosh, people do want to hear your stories. And that is also a way to stand out. So you might be talking about social media marketing, or you might be talking about nutrition or health coaching. And so many other people are also talking about the same facts and data and tips, perhaps. Um, but when you add your own personal experience, when you add a story to that, it becomes so much more um memorable and and it helps you stand out because people are getting to know you. And so I will tell you sometimes the thoughts that run through my head when I'm listening to a podcast, Carol's talking about doing more storytelling. I'm thinking, yeah, but but that's you, right? Nobody cares about my story or people just want the facts. People just want to know about the Enneagram facts. Um, I have heard though from other people that they enjoy hearing, you know, how I'm using it and my personal experience, the stories that connect the Enneagram to make it different, right? Anybody can Google anything online, but it's your stories that's going to really stand out, making you know, so I know I've said that a few times. I'll I'll stop beating a dead horse, but it really is so important. And I'm I'm something that I want to get better at myself. So there's your takeaways, both with the Enneagram insights from the Chris Stapleton concert, and then takeaways as it relates to getting visible and just you know keeping at it, remembering that it doesn't always happen, rarely happens overnight. So this is what you can expect to find inside my new self-study program called Enneabrand. It is a combination of understanding your individual Enneagram type. And then you'll go through those lessons, um, specifically relating it to being an entrepreneur, being a professional, how does your type impact that? And then looking at specific visibility, personal branding strategies around creating your message, creating your um how you share it, where you share it, how you talk about your offers. And so there's some foundational um pieces that I have shared, but you won't necessarily want to do all of them. Um, when you overlap your Enneagram type information, the insight that you learn in that section with those foundational strategies. There should be one or two, maybe three, that kind of bubble to the surface that seem fun, that seem doable, that seem aligned with your personality, your goals, your desires, where you want to go, how you want to work that you can then take and make your own. So I'm not suggesting you do all of them as kind of like a buffet. What looks good? You can always come back and get more. You can always come back and change your mind. Um, but you'll at least have the options and then also the insight about your personality to know maybe which option might make sense for me to start with at least for the next 90 days, six months. So that you can learn more about and enroll now over at enneagrammba.com forward slash anyabrand. Um, you can get full access to the program now and uh would love to see you inside. With that, I will see you back here next week where we're going to be doing an on-air typing session. So stay tuned for that one, and I'll see you soon.