SPEAKER_00 0:01

You're listening to the Enneagram MBA Podcast, a show about understanding people at work, including yourself. I'm your host, Sarah Wallace, and I'm excited to be diving into this week's episode with you. All right, so you've landed on your top Enneagram type. Whether it you knew right away or it's taken you a few weeks or months, however, you got there, you got there. And now you've arrived and might be wondering, okay, now what do I do with this information? Um, besides maybe just follow, you know, your type memes over on Instagram or order the mug or the t-shirt. I'm always joking about. Um, what else can you do to start applying this new knowledge that you have about yourself and your Enneagram type? So that's what we're gonna talk about today. We're gonna we're going to look at the growth arrows specifically for each of the Enneagram types. We've had an episode and um we'll probably do another version of it, or we'll come at it in a different angle because I do love the stress arrows, but we have um an episode and I'll link it at the bottom here, um, specifically talking about um your stress arrow, depending on your type, and and that can help give some clarification in the typing process, and it can also give some direction for what to do. Um, one thing that we have not covered is the growth arrow specifically. And I think this is a great place to start when answering the question, now what? Um, there's a lot of things that we could talk about doing. Um, this is, I think, one of the most clear, one of the most simple, and one of the most um tangible ways to actually start using and applying what you have learned about yourself through the Enneagram. There's lots of different ways. This is not but by any means an exhaustive list. Um, it's rather just a really great starting point. And that's what I love about the Enneagram, um, is that a lot of times, you know, of course, there are probably 50 different things that each of us could work on to get quote unquote better, better as a leader, a partner, a teammate, a human being, of course. However, you know, are we able to do all 50 at one time? Most likely no. Um, and so how do we prioritize? You know, and sometimes we don't even know maybe what exactly it is that we need to be focused on or looking at. We just know, oh, I, you know, I need to be more confident. Okay, I need to be more assertive. Um, or I need to improve my communication. And it's like, okay, okay, that that's good. Um, but but that's gonna be that's gonna look a little different if you happen to be a type two versus a type eight, for example. You know, a type two, you might need to be a little bit more, I don't know, direct or or or honest um with your feedback or communication. Whereas an eight, to get better at communicating, they might need to soften or uh, you know, be less brutally honest, maybe do the sandwich method depending who's in front of them. So it's going to vary. And our and by looking at the types, we can get some more specific direction. Now, just because I say this is, you know, some ideas for growth, you might already be doing them, you might disagree, you might have tried them, and that's not helpful. Um, but maybe by me saying something that you don't agree with, offer some contrast to something that inspires something else that I didn't even think of or that I didn't even mention today. Um, so maybe you'll be, maybe I can offer some uh guidance in in that indirect way as you listen to this episode. So we're we're gonna jump into it and specifically looking at the growth arrows. However, we are gonna talk about each type because each of the growth arrows really is a neglected strategy. Um, and we're gonna talk about why, because when I think when we understand why we neglect it, we can really see why there's so much growth potential in that type as well. I'm gonna start off with the type five. I don't think we've ever started off with the type five. So I thought, oh, let's let's let's switch it up a little bit and then maybe we'll start doing that uh whenever we do these episodes where we talk about something specific with all the types, but um, I'm gonna start with type five. And our type five is striving to feel detached. And that originally sounds, I think, a little negative, and um I get this particular definition from um Mario Socora. And um Mario is the founder of the awareness to action um Enneagram framework, and he has a book, he he also does uh trainings. Um, and I I really like his descriptions of the types, specifically this one, because I think sometimes when we talk about the five, initially it's they want to feel capable and competent. But I found a lot of types, especially the three, the one, um, come to mind first where it's like, yeah, I want to feel that, I want to feel capable and competent. The type six is another one. I want to feel capable and competent too. And it was adding some confusion. And so when I learned about striving to feel detached, I think that was that was much more clarifying, either as a three or a one or a six to say, oh no, that that's not me, or a five to be like, oh my gosh, yes, yes, you get it. This is this is me. And what it means to be detached isn't necessarily um, it is a little maybe emotionally detached, uh, you know, uh being a little concerned about getting emotionally overwhelmed or someone emotionally dumping on them and not necessarily know how to navigate that, um, or really wanting to navigate it is is a concern for a five. But also, you know, they want to be self-sufficient. They kind of want to be left alone to do their thing, to research, analyze, observe, uh, gather information, uh, you know, put it together, put put the report together. And typically that, you know, prefer to do it by themselves. And so being detached from other people's even expectations of them, um, their time, encroaching on their space. So, so that's where we're coming from here. And so the the type that they tend to neglect the most is the type eight, striving to feel powerful. If you're striving to feel feel powerful, um, people are going to have some expectations of you. You're in that, you're in that role, probably where people are looking to you, where they do have an expectation for for you to lead them, to take them somewhere, to give them some advice, to give them some direction. And that can feel like a lot of pressure initially. Um, you might even be, you know, looked at for your confidence, for um your leadership, your natural leadership skills that I hear a lot of eights have. Um, and for a five, you just may not be able to relate to that. And eights have a tendency to have a pretty strong gut reaction where fives really like to get all the information, look at the data, do an analyst, and then come up with a very calculated response or you know, action to take, where AIDS typically don't do that. However, are there opportunities for you to still get your core needs met and not to become an eight? But are there things that you can bring in to your type five energy that will really enhance the strengths that you already have and maybe even give you, you know, be expansive in your personality to and in the strategies that that you kind of have have to at your disposal here? Maybe your go-to strategy. Is there a way to add another tool or two by bringing in some eight tendencies to, you know, be more to be successful in a new role, to take it to the next level, whatever that means for you, to um improve a particular relationship at work or at home? Are there are there some things that you might need to do? Um, you know, is there a way to be a little bit more trusting of your instincts, a little bit more kind of gut go with your gut versus needing to take um the time to analyze and and pontificate on every single piece of information, um, which is a strength and is absolutely needed. Just a thought, you know, when when might a situation though call for you just to to jump into action? And how can you bring in some of that? So this is the type that the eight or the five tends to neglect the most. It's also where the most meaningful, I think, impactful growth opportunities are in your initial Enneagram journey to kind of putting the Enneagram into action. Our type six, some known as uh striving to feel secure. They're looking for safety, uh, belonging, security. Um, and so the type that they tend to neglect is the type nine, striving to feel at peace, right? Sixes have a reputation for being a little anxious, for being a little skeptical, thinking kind of worst case scenario, gotta be prepared. Um, and for a nine, they don't tend to really play in like that or think like that. Now, now some some do sometimes, but for the most part, um, they kind of have this kind of go with the flow. We'll see what happens. A little optimistic, it'll all work out, a little avoidant. Um, there's a problem rather than come up with a backup plan for it, like the the six might, they're probably gonna avoid it uh or do what they can to avoid it anyway. And because they want to maintain that peace. Um, nines are also very inclusive for the most part. Uh, they want all voices to be heard, they tend to be pretty accepting, they tend to be okay in the gray um and a little more comfortable in uncertainty versus the six, who is very uncomfortable in uncertainty. So this is the type that the six most neglects at first, and also has the most bang for their buck growth opportunities in this one. Not to be like a nine, but out of the qualities that we just talked about, is there what's in front of you right now that you could benefit from pulling in some of those nine tendencies of being a little bit more comfortable in the gray, in uncertainty, um, being exclusive rather than kind of this, I'll trust you once you give me a reason to trust you, this I'll trust you until you until you, you know, give me a reason not to trust you, which not all nines believe or feel. I've I've learned, um, however, that that it's a tendency that that many nines will have. And so, what are some things within there that can that can benefit you as a human being, you as a partner, you as a boss, you as a teammate, um, that you can pull in to really expand and grow with your type six energy, pulling in those nine qualities. The type seven, striving to feel excited. The type that they tend to neglect the most is the type five. We talked about the type five, striving to feel detached, they're very comfortable and honestly prefer solitude, they're okay in the silence, they're very focused. Once they put their head down, their their head is down, they're to they're at work, they're doing what they need to do, they see that project across the line. They are going to be a little bit more thoughtful, methodical, calculated in coming to a decision that is probably pretty rational. Um, and so rather than making something negative or positive, you know, fives just kind of it's like it is, it is what it is. This is the the data is the data, the information is the information. They're not gonna have a strong emotional reaction to it, whereas sevens might try and put that positive spin or it'll all work out, it'll be okay. Five is gonna be like, no, let's look at the data. It it probably isn't gonna be okay. And that's not, they don't, it's not emotionally charged. It just is. And so you need that, right? You need that kind of rationality sometimes. Um, but it that can also be a little off-putting that can sound a little boring, that can sound a little stiff to a seven. However, there's so much growth that can happen for a seven who is focused, who uses all this excitement and enthusiasm and energy and vision to put some guardrails on their all on all these ideas and really focus on one and make it happen, get it done. And rather than just jump in and, you know, the jump and the net will appear, leap and the net will appear saying, like let's bring in some five energy and make sure that we have some options for our net. Like it is likely that the net will appear. You know, you don't have to, you don't have to 100% know what's around the corner, but based on the data, based on the analysis, like the five, what is likely to happen? And can we base can we be a little bit more um data driven in in our decisions? So some of those things. There's gonna be more in in that type five energy, with like all of these. I'm just kind of touching on some highlights. Our type eight is striving to feel powerful, and they're neglecting the type two, striving to feel neglect, striving to feel connected. So if you have if you're gonna be connected, you probably need to have some meaningful relationships. And to have meaningful relationships, you need to open up, probably be a little vulnerable sometimes. And being vulnerable is a core fear for our type eights. They fear being taken advantage of, they're there, people in their close circle to be taken advantage of. They want to be strong and powerful and avoid being vulnerable and weak. And so this striving to feel connected can almost put them at odds with that core driver. However, there's a lot of growth that can be had in the type two energy as a type eight, striving to feel connected, um, maybe being a little bit more understanding and empathetic. Eights are known for being direct and brutally honest and telling it like it is. Um, but in every situation or with every person, um, is that the best way to communicate? Is that the best way to share feedback? Probably not. And so the gift of a two is their ability to connect with others, is their ability to really see people, to really um understand how they're doing, how they're feeling. And so, how can you take the time? We you have it in you, but just how can you take the time to pay attention to who's in front of you and what does that person need? They may need your directness and your brutal honesty, but but they may need something different. And so, how can being connected and maybe even vulnerable still feel powerful? Because we don't want to change our core driver for any of these, and and we can't. It's just it's not sustainable. The the actions, the growth will not be sustainable if it does not also align with our core driver. So, not how can you change your core motive to wanting to feel connected, but how can striving to feel connected still make you feel powerful and strong? What's in the two that can really enhance where you need to go, who you want to be right now in your role, in your career with your goals and your company. Um, so looking more into the type two if you uh happen to be a type eight. Our type nines are striving to feel at peace, which we've talked about. And the type that they tend to neglect the most is striving to feel outstanding, the type three. The type three is okay with being recognized. And in fact, they they want to be recognized um many times publicly in front of others, get the award, get the trophy, you know, win the the most sales, the the vacation for most sales or for hitting the goal, and and and to to do it in front of an audience. And um they tend to be really good at inspiring others. Um, they tend to jump into action and and do whatever is needed to get the job done, to make the to get to the result, right? So there's a lot of good things in there, but sometimes that can feel like in direct conflict with striving to feel at peace, which our nines tend to prefer to, you know, kind of be behind the scenes a little bit more. They definitely want to be recognized. They, you know, feeling invisible is is a common struggle for our type nines. However, I think their preference is more, you know, having their boss call them into the office or a side conversation or, you know, a simple no, thank you note, or whatever it is saying, hey, you're doing great, or thanks for that, or I see you, I notice you, rather than let's get on stage and round of applause and speech, you know. Um, however, are there some things that could benefit you as a nine if your success was a little bit more public, if more people knew the things that you were good at, if more people were recognizing um what all you have accomplished. Um, would it be, you know, okay, wow, I didn't realize this. They're ready for the promotion, they're ready for the raise, they're ready for this new exciting project. Um, I just didn't know that they were doing all this stuff. Um, so that that's one thing um that a nine can kind of look at and initially probably feel resistant, but is there a way that you can be outstanding while also feeling at peace? Our type one is striving to feel perfect. The type that they tend to neglect the most is that of the seven, striving to feel excited, striving to feel excited when you're enthused, when you're looking for the next adventure, when you have a little FOMO. It kind of feels reckless, like you kind of feel like you're out of control. Maybe uh you're, you know, you're a mess, you're scattered, you're breaking the rules, and that can just be the exact opposite at times of what the type one is really wanting. However, there is a lot of growth for our type ones within that seven energy, you know, bringing joy, more joy, you know, being a little bit more flexible, allowing for um, you know, more options to be in the gray. Ones tend to be kind of black and white thinking, right or wrong, this or that. Sevens, you know, a little bit like the nine we talked about, they're a little bit more comfortable in uncertainty and they don't have to know exactly the next step or exactly the next, you know, 10 questions that are going to be on the interview or that are going to be asked on the panel, whatever it might be. Um, and so is there a way to kind of balance that striving to feel excited so that it enhances and expands all the strengths and the one energy that makes you you? Is there a way what makes the most sense to focus on within that type seven energy? Our type twos are striving to feel connected. And so this hype that they tend to resist the most initially is striving to feel unique, that of the four. Fours and twos are known for being in that feeling center of intelligence, having a lot of feelings. Um, however, twos tend to be more others focused, more aware, and wanting to know how others are feeling. Fours are a little bit more focused on how am I feeling? How am I doing? What do I think about this situation? What do I need? And that can feel like in direct conflict with wanting to connect with others. It can feel selfish, it can feel self centered, it can feel like almost wrong. Like you need to be, you know, worried about. Others. Whereas a four has a lot of lessons, has a lot of growth opportunity for the two. And one of those is that that just that stereotypical, you got to put it on your own oxygen mask analogy that you hear a lot. And that's something that a two can really gain from a four. Um, understanding what do you need, not what others need or what others expect you to need or want, but truly, what do you need right now? Um and fours are a little bit more comfortable with with saying what they need, and that might include saying no. Um, they're also going to be a little bit more comfortable with sitting in hard feelings, whereas a two really wants to they care about their people and they they feel like sometimes too, they know exactly what they that person needs to do in a time of crisis or a time of need, and they have a lot of advice. It can feel a little overwhelming sometimes on the receiving end of unsolicited advice. And so, how could you maybe channel some of that for energy and just sit with that person and just say, listen, just listen, or just say, Yeah, that sucks. I'm sorry that that happened. That's not fair, you know. I wish there was something that I could do. Um, yeah, you know, feel that way without jumping into advice. And so um I I know that as a leader, as a teammate, as a partner, just channeling some of that energy, and someone just really wants to feel seen and heard rather than talked at or given advice to. Um, that can go a long way. And so maybe that there's something in that four energy that's yours to work on and to focus on as a type two. Our type threes are striving to feel outstanding. The type that they most resist at first is that of the type six, striving to feel secure. If you're secure, it's kind of makes it hard to feel outstanding, right? Or be outstanding even. Um, if you're secure, maybe you're going along with the status quo. Maybe you're not rocking the boat. Um, if you're secure, maybe you're settling, maybe you're sticking with the safe job rather than taking the risk and going with the, you know, new shiny startup out opportunity that if it worked out, you would definitely feel outstanding. However, there's a lot of risk involved too. So is there or what is in the energy of the six that can really complement what you already have going on as a three? Um, how can you find maybe safety, security, maybe being a little bit more collaborative? Um, some threes are incredibly inspiring and motivating and are really great at bringing their team up along with them. However, there are some threes and that that kind of average, stereotypical level where um they're really focused on themselves. And so they can get a reputation for being selfish and um even kind of fake, like we don't even know who this person is. Uh, they're never real with us, they never share their failures or even their worries. And sixes tend to be a little bit more self-revealing. Uh, they tend to voice concerns, they tend to share, you know, uh what maybe what didn't go right. And so they are able to build trust with that transparency. Uh, they do tend to be very collaborative, very much focused on what's best for the group rather than what's best for me. Um, and so how can you still feel outstanding while maybe helping others also feel outstanding, being more collaborative? Um, do you need to feel outstanding in every single part of your life? Are there areas um that you could get some relief in if you just allowed for it to maybe, you know, settle? And sometimes that's a bad word, but maybe for a six, that could be a huge area, or for a three, that could be a huge area of opportunity for growth because then it allows you to be even more outstanding in the areas that are really important to you. So I don't know you, I don't, you know, obviously I don't, I don't know what you're working on or or who you want to be, where you want to go. But but this this type looking at the six could offer some very specific um pieces to focus on and to look at practicing. And then last but not least is our type four, striving to feel unique. The type that they resist the most is striving to feel perfect, the one. Oh my gosh, the structure, the routine, the organization, the black and white thinking. It just feels so boring, so heavy, so confining as a type four who has a lot of creative energy, a little bit like the seven, has a lot of spontaneity, very in touch with their feelings. So just, you know, what do I feel like doing today versus what, you know, what does my calendar say I should do? What do I feel like doing? Right. And so there's benefits to that, but there may also be some opportunities for growth and for expansion by stepping into some of the one qualities, by putting some guardrails on that creativity and that vision that you have as a four, that on authenticity that you so you know creatively, you know, put together and put out into the world? Is there a way though that routine could help you share the vision? Is there a way that structure and organization could bring some of these meaningful, uh, this meaningful work, meaningful ideas that you have? Um, could that could that energy help you bring it to life rather than it just be an idea that you think about and dream about? Um, and so that might be some areas, those might be some areas for the type four uh to really look at. And some of these aren't easy and you might be resistant to them initially, right? Um I I know that. I know as a seven, like thinking about initially, like how could I, how could I bring in some five energy, like that, that and the one were some of the ones that I was like, oh, those are the types I want to be least like. Um, interestingly, I'm able to, you know, be a more aware, um uh like a a better partner, a better business owner, a better um, and by better, you know, what what my business need, what my relationships need is sometimes organization and structure and focus in my situation. And so understanding what my growth arrow is and and also looking at at the stress arrow, what what resources are in there as well, um, can help you do the thing that is most important to you. And so I'll leave you with that today. Your homework is to understand what that growth arrow is and start to look at what is that growth arrow made up of and what maybe one, two, three qualities can you pull in to enhance, not change or be like anybody else, but enhance what you already have, where you want to go, who you want to be. Thanks so much for being here today for this solo episode, and I'm looking forward to seeing you back here next week. When I'm not planning for the next episode or getting to interview the next podcast guest, I'm probably out doing an Enneagram team training or a group workshop experience. Because while Enneagram MBA is a podcast, it is also a team training company, which means whether you have a team of four or 40 or are planning an event for 400 people, there is an experience that is waiting to be created just for you and your team or organization or event. And I'm gonna invite you to start that process over at EnneagramMba.com where you'll be able to check out some of the initial ideas and options and then reach out to get in touch to start planning your own.