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You're listening to the Enneagram at Work Podcast, a show about understanding people at work, including yourself. I'm your host, Sarah Wallace, and I'm looking forward to diving into this week's episode with you. Are you working with an Enneagram type 9? In our Enneagram at Work series, we are looking at how to start to notice and maybe get curious about what type your teammates might be, and not so that you can label them, put them in a box, pretend that we know everything about them or we know them because we think we know their type. We might get it wrong. But what the intention of the series is, is to start to really recognize the way that somebody else on your team, maybe it's your manager, a teammate, somebody that you lead, maybe it's even a client, and you'll never know their type. Um, but or don't want to say never, but most likely you won't know their type. Um, but you can start to recognize some of this, some of these common tendencies of a particular viewpoint, a perspective in life that might influence the way that they're showing up in your meetings, um, to collaborate on a project, um, just kind of the day-to-day interactions over Slack or email. And um, so that you can also at the same time realize, oh, wow, that's really different for me. And the story that I share based on my viewpoint may not, in fact, be at all true because they're seeing this a completely different way. Um, so the intent is to just bring some awareness about other viewpoints and perspectives and understand those a little bit better. Um, and then also based on that energy that we're getting from that person, um, how might we be able to work better with them? Um, collaborate more effectively, have, you know, a happier, healthier workplace relationship. We spend so much of our life at work, which means we're around a lot of our coworkers on a regular basis, even over, you know, Zoom or email or Slack. And so why not do what we can to make that environment and those relationships um not just tolerable but enjoyable? And this is we don't have to be best friends outside of work, right? But when we go in, um, research shows that you're gonna be more creative, you're gonna be better at your job, you're gonna be more successful in your overall career when you are going into a team and an organization where there are thriving relationships where people care about each other, where there's psychological safety and trust and um, you know, even some, some, some jokes and and and and that kind of thing. So um that is the point of this series. And today we are looking at our type nine. Now we started this series with our type five, six, seven. Last week we covered type eight. And so if any of those are of interest to you, you'll have to go back and check those out. Coming up, we have type one, and then we're gonna be looking at type two here in a couple of weeks. Um, and if you are new, welcome. Um, I hope that you will go through the library, whether it's this series or another episode that jumps out at you and and and dive into some of those conversations. Um, and if you are returning, welcome back. I'm glad that you're here. Um, as a reminder, yes, I am the host of the Enneagram at Work Podcast. I also have a company called Enneagram NBA that does team training and group workshops and um even conference uh presentations and breakout network breakout opportunities. And uh you can learn more about those over at EnneagramMBA.com. And what we're gonna talk about today are some clues as to some common qualities, characteristics, viewpoints of our type nine, and then also some specific ideas for what to do to get along better with them at work or be more supportive or just be a better teammate to this potential type nine in your life. And one thing that I hear from nines consistently is that they sometimes get painted uh as this person who doesn't know what they really want or or don't know what they they think about something. And maybe sometimes that is true. However, what I hear is that in fact these type nines absolutely have some really strong opinions on certain things. However, because they don't want to rock the boat, because they don't want to upset somebody, because they don't want to put themselves in a situation, uh, maybe where the spotlight is is all of a sudden on them, that they will hold it in. And so I think that's a a myth that we wanna that we wanna kind of bust right away. And then um something else that has come up specifically about this type 9 um energy is the way that they want to receive feedback and recognition more importantly. And uh over the summer I had a workshop with a group and we were talking about how each other prefers to be recognized, like what makes them feel appreciated. And it might seem like common, like a common uh desire to want to be acknowledged and given a shout out in front of the team, in front of the group, maybe get an award by the organization. But there was a couple of nines in the room. And so again, not all nines everywhere, every time, but in this particular workshop, there were there were two nines, and they said, you know, I I really don't want to be recognized ever in front of other people. Um, if you appreciate something that I'm doing, I would prefer to have it mentioned privately. Um, it just makes me feel really uncomfortable. Kind of shared some other reasons, and and so for that, like I the way that I want to be recognized is privately. And it does mean a lot for for you to recognize me. I just don't want to have to go on stage and get an award. I I don't want the the camera on me. I don't want everybody looking at me necessarily when you do it in a big group. And the manager was really surprised. He thought, he said, you know, I didn't think of anybody not wanting that. And I thought that I would be doing you a favor and being really supportive and you know, letting you know I appreciate you by shouting you out in front of everybody. And they said, No, that's my worst nightmare. So again, that may be true for the nine in your life. It may not be, but it is an excellent question to at least get curious about and to ask about. So now, without further ado, we'll we'll get into our type nine um clues. But before we do, I do want to set the stage as far as what makes a nine a nine. At the end of the day, it is this striving to feel at peace, both inner peace within and then outer peace with the world around them, the people around them, the environment around them. Uh, one of their many superpowers is helping other people feel comfortable. They really shine at building an inclusive team. And they can build that team, whether they are the manager leading the team, or they're just bringing that inclusive, calming, kind of steady presence and leading that way with their peers on the team. Um, everybody kind of feels relaxed. There's this, just this kind of like sigh of relief. I hear it described sometimes when this nine walks in the room or or when they kind of uh yeah, might step in and just being there, just sitting in the chair. I hear sometimes say, people will say, like, I just feel calmer, I just feel more relaxed, feel less anxious when this person's around. Um, sometimes a struggle that our type nines will have is indecision. And I just mentioned that can also be a myth that all nines are indecisive all the time. Um, you know, I think we all can be indecisive and then we can all be very decisive. Same thing for our nines, but but they do sometimes, um, some more than others may struggle with that. Um, you know, it's and sometimes they get this nice guy or nice girl, nice person syndrome, where, you know, they can kind of feel like a pushover, um, and that that people are kind of walking all over them or or they do get walked over because they are so nice. Um, sometimes they may struggle with holding back their how they really think or what they or how they really feel about a certain situation because they're wanting to avoid conflict. And sometimes conflict, especially when it when it's done in a healthy, productive way, it is necessary. It is a part of being around other people and relationships with other people. Um, but it, you know, how you navigate that conflict uh or handle that conflict, you know, makes the difference. But it it the conflict will always happen. There's no way to avoid it all the time. Um sometimes they can get passive aggressive. Um, and then it they sometimes will also struggle with being clear because they are worried about saying the wrong thing, and not the wrong thing or the right thing, like the one, but the wrong thing where maybe somebody takes it in a way that they didn't intend for it to be taken, or they offend somebody or they hurt somebody's feelings, or they they say something um maybe that goes that would cause a stir, um they maybe dance around it a little bit. Um, maybe they're not as just direct. This is what I think. Maybe they they over-explain. Um, and so that could be a struggle. And and when nines have really, you know, done a lot of studying on themselves and done a lot of growth, you won't see these as much. But for somebody who maybe is newer on their self-awareness, self-growth journey, you might come across some of these. Sometimes self-deprecating is another one that comes up for our nines as a struggle. Um, but how to know if you're working with a type nine. Um, one clue might be that they tend to be quiet in meetings, but you know, you can see that they're paying attention. And maybe they're paying attention and kind of nodding along and and agreeing, um, or they appear to be agreeing with everybody. Um, so they're they're paying attention. They just might not be saying a lot. Um, you might be working with a type 9 if even when they don't offer an opinion, they still want to be asked. And so maybe they've said that, maybe you kind of have picked up that that vibe, you've uh gotten curious and just asked, whatever, however, you figure this out. And this is absolutely something that I I regularly hear from nines is I want to be asked. I I may not have the energy to go to happy hour, or I may not want to be a part of that group, or I may not have anything to say. Like I truly may not have any opinion on this, a strong opinion, but in all of those situations, I want to be asked. That's what a nine is thinking. And sometimes you might need to ask them twice, right? You might need to prompt a little bit more than just that one time um to get them to say something, but also respect when they just they don't have anything to say. And I feel that. Um, and and sometimes it's like, oh, is it because I don't, and I identify as a type seven, but there are just some things where I just I truly do not have a strong opinion. I know that there are some people who have a strong opinion about everything and kind of know immediately how they feel one way or the other. Um as a seven, I really resonate sometimes with this nine energy where it's like, I genuinely don't know. Like I'm gonna have to think about it for a minute, um, if I'm being honest. You know, I want to think about what do I think about this? Let me marinate on that. Or listen, I truly don't don't care. I I truly don't, um, you know, it's not, I could go either way. Um, and when we are on the receiving end of that and tend to be somebody who has strong opinions, um, that can feel like, no, no, well, like what do you really want to do? Tell me, you're hiding. You're and and so when people say, you know, I really, I, I genuinely don't have a strong opinion, you know, the rest of us need to respect and move on and not keep trying to push it. Um, you might be working with a type nine if they are someone great to talk to when you have a problem because they seem to always understand your point of view and don't judge. At least they don't come across as being judgmental. They come across as being really understanding and empathetic. And um, yeah, you know, I can see that that viewpoint. I can absolutely see why you would think that. And that's another one of those superpowers of our type nines is the ability not to get stuck in black and white thinking, this or that, right or wrong, good or bad. It's gosh, you know, very situational. Like I can see why, you know, you might think that or why you might do that in that particular situation, uh, which feels so good on the other, on the receiving end of that um understanding. Your teammate might be a type nine if everyone seems to like them. They kind of get along with everybody, they never offend anybody, they're they're not having tiffs with the manager, with each other, with clients, you know. They're just able to really have um pleasant relationships with with everybody. Um, you might be working with a type nine if they focus on solutions rather than who is to blame when things go wrong. Um this is a quality that we'll talk about in a type nine's leadership style, is that sometimes, and I think it's a human nature, and I'm sure some nine sometimes do this as well, um, where it's something went wrong and we want to figure out who messed up. Do they need to be punished, reprimanded, what do we need to do? And instead the type nine is like, let's just figure out the solution. It doesn't matter who's to blame, let's focus on the solution rather than kind of this hunting down the person that we think might be to blame, um, which can be an incredible quality in your manager or your leader. You might be working with a type nine if they sometimes can be unwilling to take a stand or make a decision in case it offends someone or causes conflict. And this is not to say that they don't have a strong opinion or have taken you know a strong stance maybe in a a real you know conversation about a similar topic at home, but it is they they just so value that inner and outer at peace. Like that is the core driver. That is what makes a nine a nine. And so when you realize that and when you remember it, it can make sense why this can sometimes be a struggle for them. And you might see this that you're like, I'm they were just telling me that they disagree with this, or they were just telling me that they thought this was an amazing idea. Why aren't they speaking up? And sometimes it is because of this, you know, core fear of causing conflict, creating a you know, a combative environment or having some sort of disagreement or conflict with another individual. Um, what for someone else, you know, we talked about our type eight last week, they love it, they appreciate it, they respect you more if you disagree with them, right? But for a type nine, it's it's almost the opposite. They want to be very careful um that they're not offending anybody because that is just very important for them not to have um animosity, you know, stress over uh fights that they might be, you know, in the middle of. They want to avoid all of that at all cost. So if any of those are sounding familiar in the person that that you work next to or yeah, you're emailing back and forth, um, you may be working with an Enneagram type nine. And if so, it might be a good place to ask some of these questions to them, like, hey, you know, this or this, or what do you think about this, or how do you feel about this? Um, and then something else that you can ask them is we're getting ready to go through the list of how to get along with a type nine. And so these might be some prompts to ask what they prefer, because I'm sure not every single nine all the time want these things, but for the most part, these these tend to be some things that a nine appreciates um among their coworkers in the workplace. Uh, they prefer it if you are kind and you make an effort to make a personal connection. So these are the people that's gonna appreciate kind of a hi, how are you, whether it's in an email or the start of your Slack, um, similar to a type two. They they don't they appreciate it more when it when you're communicating, you know, like a human and not just, oh, we need to get this done, which there are other types that are that's the the direct opposite of what they want. And again, that is the intention of this, so that you can know what are my preferences, what are my teammates' preferences, how might those come into conflict, and are there things I can do on my end to get to better, to either get to know them better, to better manage myself in in that particular situation or with that person. Um nines value everybody's opinions, and they want their opinion to be valued as well. And this is important because when a nine does speak up and share their opinion, um to, and and you know that this is something that maybe they struggle with, you know, don't, you know, dismiss it or you know, immediately tear it apart if you know that this person already struggles with this. And this is why also when you know what your teammates might be, you can start to recognize what growth looks like for them because it's gonna look very different, right? Last week we talked about type eight, they don't have a problem sharing their opinion, they're gonna share their opinion probably about everything, and that's great. Nines, however, will not always share their opinion. And when they do, we need to make sure that we're, you know, we're recognizing it, we're acknowledging them, um, not making a big deal because I I've heard that they also don't want the spotlight, but but make sure you I think uh acknowledge it, I guess would be my my biggest tip there. Um thanks for sharing that. I'm not sure we could do that, you know, but but thanks for speaking up. That's definitely something to consider to think about. Um so making sure that you're acknowledging it when they do share their opinion. Um, understand that their sensitivity, understand their sensitivity to conflict and criticism. Um, again, we we, you know, I already kind of touched on this that their core driver, the thing that is kind of lighting their fire is that desire to be at peace. And so more so than any other type, I don't know that, you know, anybody likes to be in conflict or constant conflict. Um, you know, we all can stress and be anxious when when those that's happening in our relationships. However, it is just extra intense for a nine. And so as a teammate, as a manager, um, just realizing that and knowing that and understanding, you know, kind of what might be driving some of their behavior, and and that probably has a lot to do with it. Um, making sure that you ask for their input, even if they're not offering it up. Uh, you know, when you're in a meeting, they're probably not gonna necessarily be the first to raise their hand or may not speak up. But if you give them the space and maybe even follow up, you know, is there anything else you would add? Would are you, you know, do you want to say anything else? Um, to make sure that they're they're asking. We kind of talked about that. They they want to be asked. And then lastly, another thing that you can do to get along with a nine um is to make a point to recognize their contribution to the team. I've heard that this is really important. And it would be worth asking, you know, how I've noticed that you have provided a lot of hard work, um, a lot of effort, time, a lot of great ideas, creativity, whatever it is, to the team lately or to this project. Um, I'd like to recognize you or I'd like to, you know, bring that up. Is it okay if I talk about it at our next team meeting or on our next Zoom call with the group? Um, and they may be okay with it and they may not. And then in that case, to say, well, listen, I I want to, you know, make sure that you know that I see this and that I appreciate it. And so they may appreciate it more, more privately. Um, but this is one of those examples of, you know, real life. It's tiny, right? It's tiny, but it can make a big difference in how much they trust you and how safe they feel around you as a teammate, as a leader, if you and feel really valued and appreciated if you're asking how they want to get feedback. Hey, I want to recognize you, but but how do you uh prefer that we do that? So that is our type nine. That is a wrap. Um I appreciate you being here as always. Um, if you are looking for how to better understand the teammates on your specific team or in your specific group, maybe you have a couple different teams working together. Um, I'm gonna invite you to check out our workshop options as well as our dream team academy options over at Enneagramba.com. Would love to see you in a workshop at some point. Um, until then, thank you so much for being here. I'll see you back here next week looking at our type one coworkers.